So Clean!

One of the greatest things in the world is when you poop and only have to wipe once. It always comes as a surprise and you bless your bowels for leaving such a clean "un-mess" for you to attend to.

It just happened for me. I had to double-check to make sure. It was great the second wipe too.

More About Me

I'm currently taking part of a marketing research thingie-ma-bob for money. It's kind of like a social networking site. Anyhow, this is my profile.

If you had to identify yourself by ONE of your material possessions, which would you choose and why?:
Drawing materials. I mean without drawing materials, I wouldn't be doing what I love doing today... which is, well, drawing.

I was also thinking a computer, but that's only if it has internet access and other things to distract me from thinking about why I only have one material possession.

What would you do with $10 million?
I'd put $7.5 million in the bank to accrue interest so I could, essentially, live off the interest for the rest 'o my life.

I'd spend the remaining $2.5 million on a house and adding wings to my car.

What does "influence" mean to you?:
Directly or indirectly affecting another [noun] with your own witty antics.

In your life, who or what influences you the most?:
The sun.

Who do you feel you influence the most? How? About what? :
My boss. He tells me what I have to do so I don't end up living in a box.

Quote of the Day

Jerry: Black guys loooooove dancing.

I don't know how I feel.

In all seriousness, I don't know how I feel or am supposed to feel about this.

It's essentially a giant napkin-poncho you put on elderly people so they don't spill their food on themselves.

I mean I'm happy it keeps their clothes clean, but it still makes me feel a little bit sad.

You can find more information about the Permalux Table Linens on amazon.com.

Grasshopper and the Ants

I just watched one of those old Disney Silly Symphonies titled, "The Grasshopper and the Ants". Not to spoil anything, but I will, that grasshopper got let off the hook really easy.

He should've knocked on the door, the ants should've brought him in and eaten him.

Lazy piece of crap.

I should be offended, but I'm laughing instead.

Chris: Do you want me to bring my Wii Remotes?
Me: Nah, it's okay. I have four.
Chris: Fuck you.

Lack of Tiny Thoughts

I find it quite interesting, as statiticians and the sort would love to derive this conclusion from the data, that Tiny Thoughts has gone down in "quantity" over the past few months.

The main reason? I left my old job in August.

Think about that!

Or don't.

I won't know or mind.

Rushing to the Airport

Why is it that when people are leaving for the airport for their return flight home from a vacation that they always seem to be "rushing" to get to the airport?

Why didn't they diligently schedule their time so they could arrive at the airport early and enjoy a book, magazine, beer, coffee or even churro for an extra half hour to an hour?

It's like being there until the very final moments is what makes the trip worth your while, hand in hand with the fact that you're carrying 80 pounds of luggage and running down the terminal like a mad woman and/or man.

Hilarious, true... but ever so inconvenient.

George Clooney

George Clooney can only play one character: himself.

Remember the movie Batman and Robin? Yeah, that was Batman as George Clooney.

Nerd Laugh

I've noticed that my laugh has changed dramatically over the years. Specifically saying, I laugh more I'm from the movie Revenge of the Nerds. I laugh inwards.